


A Million Moments in Time

by MercuryHomophony



Series: To Date A Cervitaur [9]
Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: Character Study, Drabbles, F/F, M/M, Original Character(s), Requests, Shorts, tdac hiatus
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-04-22
Updated: 2016-06-26
Packaged: 2018-06-03 21:01:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 6,345
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6626128
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MercuryHomophony/pseuds/MercuryHomophony
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Missing moments in the To Date a Cervitaur series~!</p><p>(Something to tide you over while I'm on hiatus)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. My Best

Will wasn’t used to this kind of high-speed chase, but he was learning to like it - the mad scramble through the woods, the abandon of the usual silence that marked hunting, the -  
  
“C’mon, we’ve almost caught them!”  
  
The deer boy who was much faster than him, hanging back to make sure he didn’t get lost. How sweet.  
  
He would bet his remaining eye that Dipper didn’t even realize he was holding back, but despite the fact that Dipper could have easily caught up to the flock of sprites they were after, he was bounding just ahead of Will, just in sight.  
  
And then he shot into the air and out of sight. Will skid to a halt, blinking in confusion. Before him was a pair of fallen trees, each wider than he was tall, with a small opening between the two trunks… but no Dipper.  
  
Then, there was a thud on the other side, and Will caught a glimpse of fur through the hole. “Dangit,” Dipper panted from the other side of the logs. “I think they went this way? Or maybe…”  
  
Will looked at the obstruction between them, not really paying attention. It was readily clear that he wasn’t climbing over it anytime soon, with his short legs, and a glance either direction told him that going around was out. He couldn’t jump it, like Dipper had (and boy, had that been a surprise! He wouldn’t have thought cervitaurs could jump like deer, what with the extra torso weight, but…).  
  
That left one choice. That hole was probably big enough to squeeze through. He was pretty small.  
  
Dipper still wasn’t paying attention to him when he poked his head through, busy as he was trying to figure out where the sprites had escaped to. Finding that he had plenty of room for his head, Will pushed one arm through, then the other, and pulled himself forward.  
  
His feet left the ground, and he was almost through-  
  
Oh.  
  
Oh _shit._  
  
He pushed a little harder, kicking his legs uselessly in the air. No use.  
  
He was stuck.  
  
Fortunately for his ego, Dipper still hadn’t noticed yet, so he tried to wiggle back - he’d gotten into this position, he should be able to get out, right?  
  
Unfortunately, for all his wriggling, he couldn’t manage to get far enough back to get purchase on the ground, his feet dangling probably inches from the ground, and it was too tight a fit to push against the trunk itself. In the end, all his struggles earned him was an even more ruffled appearance, and he flailed his arms and legs in a desperate bid to fix his situation.  
  
“If we split up along these paths, we should be able to contact one another,” -and that was when Dipper decided to turn around- “if we… Will, what are you doing?”  
  
Will looked back at him pitifully, hanging in a hole between two fallen logs, dangling in limbo. “I’m doing my best, Bambi,” he replied as gravely as he could manage.  
  
Going by Dipper’s laughter, it hadn’t been too convincing.


	2. "So You're Aquatic Now."

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mabel takes some time to teach the townsfolk about being aquatic. Ford looks on.
> 
> (Takes place before the events of TDaC, a little after the flood. Requested by Krazyfan1! (I took it in a slightly different direction - I hope you don't mind.) Thank you~!)

“Are you sure she’s up to this?” Ford asked, looking over the crowd. The turnout wasn’t too substantial - some ten to twenty people, and fortunately only about a third of them in tanks. The rest looked to be either amphibian or water-related land dwelling cryptids, like the kappa over in the corner, pretending to take pictures with a cinder-block.

That man creeped him out, and he did not understand _why_.

“She’s absolutely got this,” Dipper replied with firm conviction. “Mabel’s wanted to be a mermaid since _forever_. Anything a human could know about being an aquatic cryptid, she knows.” Ford looked over at his nephew, who was surveying the crowd himself, ears twisted down and back anxiously. “She’s got this.”

“You sound convinced, but you don’t _look_ convinced.” 

Dipper’s face snapped around to look at him, eyes wide in that “deer-in-headlights” expression he’d been doing more often as of late. “I _am_ convinced!" he (didn't) squeak. "Mabel will do a good job!” He looked back out over the group. “I just… I hope it’s enough. Until we can fix everyone, that is!”

“We’ll figure it out soon. And in the meantime, anything Mabel tells them can’t hurt.”

“Yeah…” Dipper didn’t seem too reassured, but before Ford could ask, the cervitaur’s ears perked up. “Oh! She’s starting!”  
Sure enough, Stan and Soos were rolling Mabel’s tank onto the makeshift stage, the pink-tailed mermaid grinning and waving at the people gathered to listen to her talk.

“Good morning, ladies and gentlemen! Thank you all for coming to my presentation: “Mermaiding 101! Or, So you’re an amphibian!” She rubbed her finned hands together, excitement nearly tangible. “Let’s get started!”

—

Ford had to admit it - he was honestly quite impressed. Mabel had a strength of personality that often reminded him of his twin, with lots of show and a magnitude that just couldn’t be ignored.

The main difference was, Mabel used her power for good. Stanley, he wasn’t so sure about. Maybe Chaotic Neutral.

Regardless… he often thought of her as the Stanley of the younger twins. Where Dipper was so much like himself, he assumed Mabel was like his brother. And she was. But, she was a little like himself, too. Dipper hadn’t exaggerated her expertise on the topic - even Ford had learned a good number of things during that presentation. And the hand-drawn posters (all watercolor, of course) that she had put together for demonstrations reminded him of his own sketches in his journal.

He was starting to realize that things with Mabel and Dipper weren’t so clear-cut as he’d thought originally, but maybe, maybe that was a good thing. Maybe Dipper and Mabel would be able to keep things together, where he and Stanley had failed to.

“Mabel!”

The mermaid flipped in her tank, eyes lighting up when she saw him. “Hey Grunkle Ford!” She propped herself up on the side as best she could, pushing her sopping hair from her face. “Did you like the presentation?”

“Mabel, I won’t mince words - that presentation was amazing. Your knowledge on the topic of aquatic cryptids is unlike anything I’ve ever seen!” He looked out over the crowd, who were starting to disperse (some more slowly than others, being pushed along in various water containers. “And what’s more…” he looked back at her. “You’ve really used that knowledge to make a difference for people.” She beamed, and he ruffled her hair, ignoring the fact that his paw was getting soaked in the process. “You should be proud of yourself. I know I am.”

And Mabel’s smile could have outshone the brightest star.


	3. Jerky

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Will is curious and Dipper answers an uncomfortable question.  
> Or in which flirtation requires "tact."
> 
> (This scene/joke was cut because it didn't really fit well anywhere, and takes place between chapters 22 and 23.)

“So I’m your first boyfriend, right?”

Dipper slowed his movements, broom dragging across the floor to a careful stop as he looked over at Will. The hunter was sitting at the register, chin propped on one hand, smiling cheekily at him from across the store.

“Yyyes?”

Will’s smile widened, a hint of teeth starting to show. “Am I the _first_ person you’ve ever dated?”

Dipper narrowed his eyes at him, before looking away, resuming his sweeping. “Nope.”

“ _Re~eally_?” The musical lilt to Will’s voice made Dipper pause again, looking suspiciously over at his boyfriend. “Who else have you dated? Anyone I know?”

“Actually, yeah.” Dipper didn’t know what had gotten Will on this train of thought, or _why_ , but it seemed harmless enough. For now. “Candy.”

“Really?” Will sounded genuinely surprised this time. “The… fox-girl, person?”

“Yeah. It was only for a day, tho.” Dipper wasn’t sure exactly why he was volunteering this information, but he’d already started, and if Will was curious about something, you usually didn’t hear the end of it until he found out. “She’s a Gumiho - Ford did some research on them since, but they’re apparently cursed to eat their lovers. So, uh… yeah. That didn’t work out.”

“Yeah, I can see how eating your boyfriend alive would put a damper on the relationship,” Will mused, tapping his cheek with one finger.

“We’re better friends than boyfriend-girlfriend anyways,” Dipper continued, stooping to grab the dust pan from its spot in the corner. “What about you? Any past flames?”

“Ehhh…” When Dipper looked over at Will, the hunter was avoiding his gaze. “I mean, there were a lot of _people_ , but… No, no real relationships.”

“Huh.”

Will blinked over at him. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Nothing, nothing…” Dipper swept the dust-pile up, small smile on his face. “Just interesting, is all.”

He could feel Will’s gaze boring into his back. “I mean… I _could_ have,” the human said, a little louder than necessary.

“Mm-hm.”

“I could totally have had a bunch of relationships.”

“Yep.”

“Total Cassanova over here.”

“I believe you,” Dipper snickered. Out of the corner of his eye, he caught Will’s pout and sighed. “Seriously, Will. I am not doubting your romantic abilities. I mean, you got me in the end, right?”

William perked up immediately. “That I did,” he sighed, once again satisfied with himself. Dipper resisted the urge to sigh, a smile still tugging at his lips. Will’s ego was funny, sometimes. Despite all his bluster, he still needed some reassurance.

“What’s the weirdest pickup line you’ve ever heard?”

“What’s with the twenty-questions?” Dipper asked. He tucked the broom and pan back into the closet, and went to sit at the counter, haunches down and forelegs straight.

“I’m curious. And bored.”

“Dangerous combination,” the cervitaur teased. Will gave him a toothy grin.

“Damn straight. So entertain me. Weirdest pick-up line?”

“Ummm…” Dipper thought for a moment… then his ears shot down, a blush starting to spread across his face.

Will’s grin widened. “Oooh, looks like a good one!” he goaded, poking Dipper in the cheek. The cervitaur swatted his hand away, face getting redder. “C’mon, Bambi, spill!”

“It, uh… I mean, it wasn’t…”

“Nope, you’re in this far, you may as well tell me!”

Dipper opened his mouth to protest… but closed it again when he saw the look on Will’s face. Nothing was going to deter the man.

He sighed.

“Fine, but… Mabel _never_ hears about this, got it?”

“I make no promises,” Will replied pleasantly. Dipper rolled his eyes.

“That’s the best I’m going to get, isn’t it?” Will nodded, and Dipper sighed again.

“So, this one girl came into the shop one time… and I guess she was trying to flirt with me, or something, and I was kind of… ignoring her…” Dipper coughed awkwardly. “She uh… wasn’t being subtle.”

“So what did she say?”

“Umm…” Dipper coughed again, then muttered something quietly.

Will leaned closer. “Sorry, Whitetail, didn’t catch that.”

Dipper sighed. “She said, “When’s your break, so I can get you out of those fuzzy pants and get a taste of deer jerky?””

—

Will’s ensuing laugher predictably summoned Mabel to the room, but to Dipper’s great relief, the human kept his secret, despite threats of tickling. And he was still laughing about it when they went to bed that evening.

“Do you think that would have worked if _I_ used it?” he asked, giggling. Dipper just rolled his eyes.

“I probably would have punched you.”

Will sighed, snuggling closer with a small smile. “That sounds about right.” He nuzzled the back of Dipper’s neck. “G’night, Bambi.”

“...night, Will.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next one will be about Paz, and will be up in a day or so!


	4. Dangerous Creature

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pacifica knows what she is. (Takes place just after the Flood-ish)

Pacifica was a dangerous creature.

She knew it, from the moment she’d opened her eyes that fateful day, after the flood. She’d felt a tingle, just behind her eyes, like a sneeze waiting to happen, and then she realized she was staring straight at a statue of the tourist she'd been standing near.

Pacifica did her _own_ research after the flood happened. It wasn’t that she didn’t trust the Twins, exactly… she just didn’t trust them fully. They weren’t friends (yet, but she didn’t know that then). They were just past the point of animosity, and her parents hadn’t necessarily encouraged her hanging out with them.

So Pacifica was the one who educated herself on Gorgons. Pacifica was the one who dug through her family’s heirlooms until she learned about the Coven. Pacifica was the one who petitioned their assistance for the town. And her parents turned a blind eye (almost literally) to her actions as she used her influence to shut the town down.

(When someone like Pacifica Northwest said Gravity Falls was closed for “Renovations,” then Gravity Falls was _CLOSED._ )

One thing her parents _did_ enforce was that, until she got her pendant, no one “normal” was allowed to see her. Her old friend group of popular socialite heiresses, like herself, evaporated almost instantly.

New friends weren’t quickly forthcoming, either. Pacifica Northwest was a dangerous creature. She had eyes that had turned half the staff to stone. She had coils that could strangle even Manly Dan. She had fangs that dripped poison so potent that sometimes her _spit_ etched marks in the sink. And now, with the Coven’s arrangement, she had magic, something that the townsfolk were still getting used to, in the chaos. She was loved, for being the rich, giving person she was.

But she didn’t fool herself. She was feared, too. And fear made life lonely, for a long time…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Are you all ready for the end of hiatus this Sunday? :3 I'm gonna try and have a little something for you every day till then. AND~! We'll have an update on Monstrum Addendum, too~! ;3c


	5. Cut Stuff!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some cut characters and scenes for your enjoyment~! :3

Characters:

**Annabelle Leslie, the Gnome Queen** \- “Annabelle Leslie was just twenty-three when she arrived in Gravity Falls, on the run from an overbearing boyfriend. While in town, the locals (an odd bunch, to be sure) recommended she check out the tourist trap just outside of town, to lift her spirits. While walking there, she accidentally ran into a strange, charming young man by the name of Norman… and then, into a pair of 15 year old twins who dragged him off, loudly insisting that he definitely had something he needed to do and he had to leave right then.”

Annabelle was a character I wrote up with the intent of having her in the background, commanding the Gnomes. This was back when the Gnomes were going to have a larger part in the TDaC universe, but their influence never really panned out, since it didn’t tie well together. There was even a short planned with her backstory, how she came to Gravity Falls, how she met the Gnomes, and a wedding scene.

Annabelle starts off as a relatively shy person - she’s just come out of a relationship with someone she found entirely overbearing, and needs space. Where she was, she felt she couldn’t make her own decisions without them being vetoed “for her own good,” so the trip to Gravity Falls becomes her first independent choice in a long time… and it isn’t the last. Over time, she becomes more confident in making her own decisions, and dealing with their results, good and bad, and with the help of the twins, overcomes some of her insecurities and eventually starts dating the Gnomes, of her own volition (thanks to some of the dating tips Mabel has been giving to Jeff and his crew). 

Because of the decrease of Gnomes in TDaC, and the fact that there was never a particularly good time to add her in, she ended up cut from the main storyline. I had considered simply doing a short with her as the main character, but given the themes and styles of the other TDaC shorts, that never seemed quite feasible either. So, she never got a chance at the spotlight. That said, I still consider her to be hanging out, unseen, in the background.  I still think she’s a neat character, and would love to do something with her later, either after the main storyline, or in another Gravity Falls AU altogether.

(PICTURE TO BE ADDED)

**Sev’ral Timez** - “It had been several weeks since Mabel freed them into the forest, and they were having the time of their lives! Between hugging trees, putting whatever they figured was “food” into their mouths, running from loud scary noises, and singing to the local wildlife, Sev’ral Timez had etched out a lovely (if unsustainable) lifestyle for themselves.

“Honestly, the flood was a blessing. They wouldn’t have made it otherwise.”

I’ve been keeping this bunch in my pocket for a long time, hoping I’d have a chance to write a short before the main series ended, but I don’t think I’ll have the time before then. Perhaps after.

Well, their story is, they were minding their own business, “eating” and “drinking” and living free, when this like, huge cray-cray wave washed through while they were singing a five part harmony, and turned them like., _into trees_!!! Or at least, that’s what they would say. Sev’ral Timez actually turned into a bunch of Dryads, spirits that dwell in trees. Since they had to stay near their trees, and they weren’t in a particularly _interesting_  part of the woods, they go largely undiscovered for a long period of time.

They were originally part of a storyline in which Mabel disappears, and the Mystery Shack Crew have to find her and get her back, but it was cut because the timeline didn’t work. Back when TDaC first started, I had a lot of ideas of short arcs that _could_  happen, that would build the story and the world of Monster Falls that I was working in. A lot of them overlapped in time, so say, several of them could have happened in September, but because I was trying to keep the story aligned with the year, and because I cannot physically write good stuff _that_  fast, certain stories that had the strongest building qualities were picked.

This one, oddly, did not have that problem. The problem here was that there were a few particular events that _were_  set at a specific time of year or a specific order, and were critical to the story, such as McGucket’s prophecy, the Christmas hunt, Will finding out about Bill, Mabel getting her amulet, Will’s fear of water being discovered, Dipper accusing Will of -

oops! I’m getting ahead of myself here… :3c my bad!

But, the Sev’ral Timez short relied on Mabel being able to be out and about - had I stuck to the old timeline, ending the story in late December, then she would have had her amulet earlier, and it might have been possible. But then, we would have lost a lot of other arcs and characters, so I think it all turned out for the best. And hey! Maybe we’ll see them in a short _after_  everything in the main storyline has settled out~ Who knows? 

**Cuts** :  
 _(The following are simply deleted paragraphs from a few chapters that I thought were worth sharing.)_

_This piece is the conversation between Dipper and Ford, about Will being Bill. I ended up re-writing it several times, but I was always fond of this particular exchange, even if it didn’t pan out._

* * *

“Dipper.”

Dipper turned to face his Grunkle, curious. “What’s up, Ford?”

“I… have some bad news,” Ford said, faltering over his words. “I think… that, Will is Bill Cipher.”

Dipper’s body language changed immediately, tensing like a coiled spring. “That’s not funny, Ford.”

“I’m sorry, it’s not supposed to be.”

Dipper’s hooves fidgeted against the floor, clacking and clattering. “Why would you _say_ something like that?”

“I know, it’s… I didn’t want it to be true, _trust_ me.” Stanford held his hands up, as if calming a skittish animal. “I waited until the end of rut, and then waited another week, just to make sure -”

“Make sure of _what_?” he said, voice rising. “That my human boyfriend is a demon hell-bent on destroying the _world_?!”

“It’s hard to believe, but I’m sure of it!”

“How?! How are you sure of it?” Dipper started pacing, hands gesturing wildly as he did. “Cipher is a _demon_ , he doesn’t even have a physical form! You said that was part of his goal!” He rounded on his great uncle. “If he had it, why bother spending time here, pretending to be human and dating me?”

“I don’t know, but I know it’s him.”

“ _How_ ,” Dipper demanded. “What makes you so sure?”

Ford hesitated, just for a split seconds. “I… I worked with him, for quite awhile before I realized his plans for the portal.”

“I know, you’ve told me.”

“I know what he’s like, and everything, _everything_ , about Will screams Cipher.”

“That’s- _That_ _’s_ your evidence?” Dipper threw his hands in the air, snarling with disbelief. “ _That_ _’s_ what you’re going off of? Sure, Will is a little weird, but- but he’s weird like _us_!”

“Dipper, we’re not _weird_ , we’re-” The glare the cervitaur gave him stopped his sentence dead in its tracks. “Fine, I won’t start that again. But you have to believe me - it _is_ him.”

Dipper reared on his hind legs, twisting away from Ford and resuming his pacing. Ford just watched, knowing his nephew was gathering his thoughts.

After a few tense minutes, Dipper took a deep breath, hands together over his face, eyes closed. “Let’s… and I’m not saying I believe you, but let’s say, _hypothetically_ ,” he started, “that Will, somehow, is actually Bill. How did it happen? He’s _human_ , you’ve seen it yourself.”

“That river had the power to turn everyone in Gravity Falls into a monster,” Ford explained. “It’s not too far fetched that it could turn a demon into a human.”

Dipper laughed mirthlessly. “Sure, maybe, except there was at _least_ a mile of woods between the river and the town, with lots of other supernaturals moving through it. If what you’re saying is true, we should have extra humans walking around, just, everywhere!” He laughed again. “Heck, we could have just, switched the population of the town!”

* * *

_This paragraph was the original opening to “Gravity Falls Horror Story: Coven (Part 1)” It got cut and rewritten really quickly - even with Dipper’s temper problem, part of the TDaC universe is that he and Pacifica actually get along pretty well, and a large part of that is their shared love for Mabel. As a result, this seemed too out of character for even our grumpy mr. Deerper, and was cut._

* * *

Two weeks.

Two weeks, three dates, and three no-shows by one Pacifica Northwest. And it was plain to everyone that the twins were not taking it well.

Mabel had been in a slump since the second date. She’d tried to stay positive, keep a sunny smile and an optimistic outlook, but her excitement for the third date had been tentative. In Will’s opinion, at least that meant she hadn’t been _as_ disappointed.

As for Dipper, Will was learning something new about the cervitaur. Namely, that you did not fuck with Mabel Pines. He hadn’t gone off at the gorgon yet, but at this rate, Will was sure it was only a matter of time. He spotted the cervitaur once or twice, standing outside the kitchen, listening to Mabel talking on the phone to Pacifica. His tail would be twitching wildly, dragging his hooves across the floor, biting his lip to keep himself from saying anything.

When that happened, Will just tried his best to help Dipper keep his cool.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two more days till Hiatus ends~! Are y'all ready? >:3c


	6. Stan and Will's Big Adventure!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Stanley never let go of some of his old habits. (Takes place in early January, ish, sometime)

Stan spotted him the second he walked in, and Will found himself with a very heavy, very strong arm thrown around his shoulder, leading him back out. “Hey, Will! You’re friends with the cops and wouldn’t question some quality bonding time with Ol’ Stanley, right?”

“Uh…?”

“Great! We’ll be back in a few hours kids!” Stan shouted over his shoulder, and they were off.

 

—

 

Will wasn’t sure how he’d ended up here, peering over the steering wheel of a truck, driving down the road with his gargoyle boss. “So…” he started, trying to figure out how to steer this conversation. “What, exactly, is going on?”

“Well, clearly we’re going for a nice drive.” Grunkle Stan was in his more casual clothes, lounging in the passenger’s seat. “Isn’t this nice?”

“Umm…” Will tried to sit up straighter, cursing his height as he did his best to see through the windshield properly. “I guess? But it kind of seems like something is up…”

“What? Up? Haha, no, no, nothing’s ‘up’!” Stan laughed, then became serious. “But if someone pulls us over, we’re test-driving a truck from Bud Gleeful’s car lot.” He pulled something out of his pocket, and waved it in Will’s peripheral. “I’ve got the paperwork all right here. Forged your signature, you don’t mind, right?”

“You- wait, what? Why would someone pull us over?” As if summoned, a siren went off behind them, and Will caught a glimpse of Stan’s expression before the gargoyle jumped into the back seat. “Stan?”

“I’m not here, just talk your way outta it!”

“What?!” he took a quick look over his shoulder. Stan had vanished under a tarp in the back. “Stan!”

“ _Please pull your vehicle over!_ ” a familiar voice echoed behind the truck, and Will glanced at the rear-view mirror, slightly relieved to see it was only Blubs and Durland.

He pulled over, and tried for his best pleasant smile when they walked over - human form, so they must have had their amulets on. “What seems to be the problem, officers?”

“Oh, Will!” Blubs adjusted his sunglasses, smiling. “We weren’t expecting you. We caught sight of a new car in town, and thought we’d check it out. You know - make sure it’s not a tourist, or snoop or anything.” He looked over the car appraisingly. “This is a pretty sturdy truck! When’d you get it?”

“Uh… well, I haven’t gotten it yet.. I’m um… test driving it from Bud’s car lot?” He was certain they’d catch the lilt, the lift in pitch at the very end that would tell him he had no idea what was going on.

Fortunately for him, the officers were very trusting people.

“Well, alright, then! Just as long as Bud’s okay with you going out past town limits, an’ all.”

“Oh, yeah, he is,” Will lied through his teeth. “We talked about it - I wanted to make sure it could make long trips… and stuff..”

He felt like he was sweating bullets, but Blubs just nodded, then tipped the brim of his hat. “Alright, we won’t keep you. Have a safe trip, and be careful! The roads are a little icy this time of year.”

Will nodded. “I will absolutely do that,” he replied, relief washing through him… though not getting rid of the confusion.

The two stepped away, apparently to head back to their car, when Durland paused and turned back. “Oh, Will. We’re going out hunting again in a few days. Want to come with?”

Will opened his mouth to respond, then froze when a soft but clear “bark!” sounded from his backseat.

Durland blinked at him, then at the truck. “…did your car just bark?”

“Bark. I mean - No, that was me. I said dark. It’ll be… too dark? For hunting?” he floundered. The lie sat heavy on his tongue, and Durland didn’t look convinced. Blubs must have noticed the holdup, because he was coming back too.

“Everything alright?”

“Yup!” Will replied, before Durland could get a word in. “We were just talking about -”

“Woof!”

“Yip!”

And now he _was_ sweating, because something under that tarp that _wasn_ _’t_ Stan was moving, and making noises, and Blubs and Durland were starting to look at him with something more like suspicion. Blubs pulled out his nightstick, thumping it into his palm.

“Nothing personal, Will,” he said, “but I think we’re gonna have to take a look at your cargo.”

 

—

 

“Stan, we’ve told you a thousand times,” Blubs chided, sliding the barred door shut in Will’s face, “smuggling pugs is _illegal_. If we didn’t have to worry about the government finding this place, we’d have to hand you over to the authorities!”

Stan rolled his eyes from where he sat on the cot in his corner of the cell. “Look, I wouldn’t have done it myself if Santiago hadn’t _bailed_ on me at the last minute!” Stan griped. “And hey! People across the borders _deserve_ to have a pug! Keeping pugs from them is… un-American!”

“I would just like to state for the record, that I am still _very_ confused,” Will said, grabbing the bars. “Is- is pug smuggling _actually_ a crime? Why am I being locked up too? What is going on?”

“Sorry Will, but right now, you’re technically an accomplice,” Durland explained, locking the door. “Not to mention, the “borrowed” car documents with your signature on them. But I wouldn’t worry - we can’t really turn you over to any higher authorities, and Mr. Stanford Pines usually pays bail within a week.” He spun the keys around his finger and grinned. “And we know Mr. Pines - we won’t hold it against you for helping him out.”

“But I-”

“We’re off to the donut shop - see you in a few hours!”

“Wait, what about-”

“Bye!”

The police station door fell shut behind them, leaving Will gaping after them, still shocked. After a long, uncomfortable moment, he heard Grunkle Stan shift behind him.

“Well, at least we still get time to bond, right? Hey, would you believe this isn’t the first time I spent in prison? This one time, back in Puerto Rico, I-”

Stan launched into his story, and Will groaned in dismay. He hoped Ford paid bail soon...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And this is not the last time Stan will try and get Will's help with this...


	7. An Ordinary Couple

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> To those of you who wanted to know about the Twins' parents: here it is.  
> To those of you who didn't want to know: I'm so so sorry...

Dipper put a hand on Mabel’s shoulder, giving it a comforting squeeze as she fought back tears. He was little better himself, but he had a tendency to internalize his emotions, leaving his exterior a sort of grim, haunted expression.

“We’ll try again.”

 

—

 

Mr. Pines was aware of the fact that, at one point, he’d had another uncle. It was only a fact he was vaguely aware of, since his grandpa never spoke of him, and his grandma had only mentioned him once or twice. He knew that the man had passed away, many years ago, in some sort of accident. It was tragic, but as family went, the man was so far removed from his own life that he couldn’t really feel anything but a diluted sense of sadness for a man he’d never met. He’d imagined Uncle Stanford, the man’s brother, still remembered him too, but Mr. Pines had never asked him about it, and Stanford kept details of his own past very close, and very private.

Facts, it seemed, that were now laid open on the table, as he and his wife sat in the kitchen of the Mystery Shack, staring at a man oh so familiar and yet so very strange, who was looking at them with mixed concern and sympathy.

“So… you’re, the real Stanford Pines? And, the man we sent Dipper and Mabel to for the summer-”

“Is the real Stanley Pines,” Stanford-not-Stanford finished for him. Twins apparently ran in the family, Mr. Pines thought to himself, somewhat dazed by the revelations of the day. Stanfo- that is, Stanley, and this new stranger that was his other uncle, looked so alike. If it weren’t for the differences in their voices and the way they held themselves, one might not be able to tell the difference.

Much like his own kids.

“Mr. Stanford-”

“Please, call me Ford, Mrs. Pines.”

His wife hesitated. “Ford… where are the twins? Grunkle Stanf- Grunkle Stanley called us up here because something happened, but you still haven’t told us _what_.” Mr. Pines reached out to her, took her hand, and she clasped it, squeezing comfort between them. Her tearing eyes never left Ford, her gaze that mixture of fearful and harsh that only a worried mother could achieve. “Where are our children?”

Ford’s gaze flickered, moving just over their heads for a second, before back to them. “They’re alive and well, but I think they want to do the explaining.” He nodded to the door behind them. Mr. Pines heard the thump of footsteps behind him, clicking against the wooden floorboards in a curious way. He turned around, his wife a second behind him.

She screamed.

 

—

 

“One more time, just one more time… we’ve almost got it right, we can figure it out. We just need to keep trying!”

 

—

 

Mrs. Pines didn’t think they’d gotten in so late, but when Stanford had finished explaining his piece to them, it was already dark out, and the clock read 10pm. There had been an awful lot to explain, but it certainly hadn’t felt like several hours.

She couldn’t believe they’d sat through the whole thing.

“All that science-fiction and make-believe is all fine,” she told Stanford sharply when he looked to them for their reactions, “but calling us up here, saying that something has happened to the twins, and then telling us some story about _other realities_ and _monsters_ \- it’s clear to tell how you and Stanley are related, with an imagination like that.” Ford frowned, opened his mouth to interject, but she pushed through. “None of that explains where the twins are. Are they alright? Or-” she narrowed her eyes, “I suppose they’ve been kidnapped by some _creature_ in the forest?” Next to her, her husband put a hand on her knee, and she pulled back a little. “Tell me where our children are.”

“Hey mom. Hi, dad.”

She turned her head sharply at the sound of her little baby girl’s voice, and spotted the tank that had appeared in the doorway, and the familiar face that peered over the side, smiling nervously, and how, at her waist, where her legs _should have been_ , there was -

She gasped.

 

—

 

“You can’t keep doin’ this much longer, kids. Too many times, and… well, I’m livin’ proof of what happens…”

 

—

 

Mr. Pines stared at his children, trying to wrap his head around everything they’d told him. His uncle, Stanford-now-Stanley, was there too - enormous, with stone-hide, wings and a tail, as well as a man he’d never seen before in his life, who claimed he was the _real_ Stanford Pines, disappeared all those fifty years ago.

The whole thing made his head swim, and he carefully sat down on the couch next to his wife, who’d collapsed there minutes earlier.

Most parents sent their kids away for the summer, hoping they’d have fun, be safe, and grow - become more independent, freer, transform into new people.

His kids were always overachievers, so he shouldn’t have been surprised that they took that last one to a completely different level.

Dipper was fidgeting, as he usually did when he was nervous, and Mr. Pines wanted to reach out to him, let him know it was going to be okay - but for once, he didn’t know how. How do you let your son know that it’s going to be okay, when he’s been turned into some sort of deer-hybrid, and the world has just opened up into thousands of new possibilities and horrors that you’ve never known existed until today?

His wife was doing a little better with Mabel, sitting on the couch to the tank as she could, holding their daughter’s hand, petting her hair, and whispering what he imagined were meant to be encouraging words. Mabel still looked to be on the brink of tears, and both twins had this awful look of resignation in their eyes that almost reminded him of something… but he couldn’t place exactly what.

He was still trying to wrap his head around it all.

He could never have seen this coming, when he sent his kids off to visit their great uncle.

But as he thought about it, something in his memory echoed, as if he’d heard this story before… and somehow…

_Forgotten_

Memory hit him like a brick, and he collapsed, a scream on his lips.

 

—

 

“Please, just one more, just _one_ more try—!”

“Dipper, I’m sorry. Some people… just don’t take to the supernatural as well as others. And if we try any more, we could seriously hurt them!”

“…”

“…so, what do we do, Grunkle Ford?”

 

—

 

Two days later, Mr. and Mrs. Pines returned home. They’d had a lovely vacation up in Oregon, in a sleepy little town called Gravity Falls. Just the two of them, although now that they thought about it, it wouldn’t have been any other way. They’d never had the chance to have kids.

As with any homecoming, there was a sense of relief, to finally be within the halls of your own home once again… but that relief was marred when they realized that the house had been broken into while they’d been gone. Fortunately, the damage hadn’t been extensive - the thieves had mostly looted one of the upstairs bedrooms, a spare they kept for guests… they thought. They were pretty sure they could remember having someone, maybe two someones, up in that room before. Maybe children from a study abroad program somewhere, staying with them to alleviate the fact that they’d never had kids of their own. There didn’t seem to be anything else really missing around the house, but they still put in the call to the police, who did their investigating, but ultimately found nothing.

After a while, they forgot about that, too - just another part of their past that was just that - past. And they went on with their normal, ordinary lives.

 

—

 

The twins stayed on the porch, watching their parents’ car vanish into the distance, watching McGucket leave with the memory gun, in its battered brown briefcase, watched the sun set and the fireflies come out. They watched as if it would make their parents remember again, make them accept the world around them, so that they could still be part of one another’s lives.

Mabel’s tears were mostly silent, punctuated occasionally with a hiccup, while Dipper continued to fight the overwhelming urge to join her. They held each other’s hands, clasping tightly for comfort, for reassurance that no matter what, they still had each other.

When their Grunkles returned later that evening, flying slowly as they carried the twins’ stuff from home, they found Mabel and Dipper still watching, still waiting.

And when their Grunkles pulled them into all-encompassing hugs, offering aid in silence and understanding, Mabel’s sobs finally broke free, and Dipper finally let himself cry.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wrote this as a warm-up while working on chapter 52 - I'd toyed with writing this for awhile, but... I like how it turned out this way. There may be a follow-up to this at some point.

**Author's Note:**

> Well, not actually a million. But a good number!
> 
> While TDaC is on hiatus, I'll be releasing a number of shorts - either drabbles, or character info, or cut scenes - so you're not left hanging for three weeks. 
> 
> I will also be taking requests, so if you have anything you want to see/know about, just hit me up on mercurial-writ and drop me an ask~!


End file.
